Harry Potter and the Order of Anxiety

I've been trying to write, work a bit more on one of my fics- any fic- and it's not happening. Sometime between falling asleep last night and opening the .doc files this morning, I've crossed a line, and suddenly I can't write. At least I can't write the post-GoF stuff (and I just started a new one this week, because I am crazy.)

I haven't been this nervous and excited since- well, let me think. Either Star Wars Episode I, or my high school graduation. Episode One was a serious let-down in a lot of ways, but graduation was fun.

I'm terrified, though. What if she kills Snape? What if she kills Remus? What if she kills the real Alastor Moody, and we never get to see how cool he really is? What if it's an awful book?

Okay, so I don't think it'll be an awful book. But I am terribly nervous.

Nerves are not conductive to writing.

And that's the other thing- for all that I've mocked the FictionAlley people for their fears about post-OoP and fic writing, suddenly I am terrified, my own stories feeling so up in the air and I don't know where they're going to land...

11 1/2 hours.

edit - oh, this is good. A couple of us were talking over at jenavira's journal, and ginnyjake pointed out that Snape can't die yet, because then they'd need a new potions professor and a new DADA teacher, and that would be too confusing. I like this thought very much.

500 ways of killing time, or The Order of the Dark Phoenix

9 1/2 hours. And my nerves are going to kill me.

I'm finding all sorts of ways to waste time, though. So far I have taken out the trash, checked the mail (oh, yay, the power bill), posted about a dozen comments in other people's journals, re-read huge chunks of Goblet of Fire, stressed over the character death in OoP, read more chunks of GoF, and shoved books around on my shelf to make room for OoP- not that it's going there for a while; I have to read it first, then it goes to Mom.

I keep looking at the clock, willing time to go faster, which of course isn't happening.

Got the car back yesterday- it goes and it stops now. My uncle needs a fan club.

Of course, then we picked up a nail in the tire, so had to go get that taken care of. Went to the Sears in Clovis (next suburb over) instead of the Sears close to home, because Mom couldn't face those people again after they refused to help her with the battery. And my uncle got us a replacement battery in Clovis, so we figured, they're more helpful. They were, too.

Spent a fun hour wandering around the Clovis mall- even their tiny Waldenbooks is doing something for the Harry Potter book, I overheard a clerk telling someone they'll have cookies and punch.

Yes, but they have to keep mall hours, which Barns & Noble doesn't. Which amuses me.

And yes, I was going stir-crazy enough that going out to get a tire fixed seemed like more fun than staying home. It was, too.

Okay... I'm bored, and was suddenly inspired to post this thing I finished a bit ago.

( Really dark, and I'm not kidding here, Snape/McGonagall )