Alias 5xLast One, All The Time In The World

[urbandruid]

JJ Abrams,

You suck and I hate you. I hate you more than I ever hated the producers of various Star Trek spinoffs when I was a teenager, which is really saying something, because nobody does pissed off like a fifteen year old girl. Except maybe me, right now.

All your questions will be answered? Still got one: What the FUCK was that? What were you smoking? Why, why, why? Jack AND Irina? My two favorite characters in the whole world, and you had to go and kill them BOTH?

How could you be so- so- so... god, there are no words. None.

I have theories. I have plans. I have more AU fanfic up my sleeve, of course.

But I don't like you anymore. Not one bit. You've been getting progressivly dumber and doing even lamer things with your characters since you found out your show was cancelled, and this just takes the cake. You had two hours. You could have done so much, and this is what we get? THIS?

All those years, all those lies and betrayals, half-truths, manipulations, and repititions of "truth takes time", and Irina's grand scheme is... global domination? With missles?

Was there something in those couple episodes of last season I didn't watch because the show was getting boring, where things got this fucked up?

Irina Derevko is not a Bond villain. She just isn't, and nothing you say can make me think that she is.

I've heard of going out with a bang, this is more like going out with waaaaaay too many bong hits. Seriously, WTF?

You are on my list. Hell, you just bumped Bill Gates off the top. Congratulations.

NO love whatsoever
Me

*
So.

I was annoyed enough when Tom stayed behind and got himself blown up, because that was random, cowardly, and lame. He could have left the subway and, you know, sort of not died. Dude, before suicide? Try therapy. Yeah, grief sucks, but...

Before that I was happy. Marshall and Rachel are my heroes, and it was all good.

And then it started to go wrong.

And I started to wonder when we'd gotten the evil, alternate reality version of Alias. Because DAMN.

I liked the flashbacks with Little Syd.

I didn't like much else about the last hour.

The Dodge Ball of Death and the Crazy Magnet of Doom. Didn't we just leave this party last season finale, guys?

Sloane shot Jack. He fucking SHOT JACK, and then he rose from the dead Rambaldi style. The only thing I like about this is the way it ended for Sloane. Eternity, alone, trapped with nobody to help him. (Gee, maybe because he betrayed most of them and KILLED the rest?)

And Irina. Gods, what the hell was going on there? She was so multi-faceted, so complex, and at the end, it boils down to that?

You know what this looks like to me? What it reminds me of? A writer posting a fic on Fanfiction.net, getting pissed because no one read his story or everyone thought it sucked, and saying "Oh yeah? I'm gonna kill EVERYONE next chapter, so there!" And then writing it. Have your tantys at the network for the cancellation, JJ, don't do this to us.

The end scene actually made it worse for me. My OTP dies the death of blown to bits and breaking glass, and Sydney and Nancy Boy Vaughn get their happily ever after on the beach? Yes, yes, Isabelle is adorable, and I would have cried when they said the baby's name was Jack if I wasn't already teary, but I. Do. Not. Care.

Why does Vaughn get to live?

This is so dumb.

Gods. This post is so ranty and incoherent I can't believe I'm subjecting anyone to it. And I still have to write Jack and Irina for this month's licenseartistic challenges. That should be interesting.

It's not like I've ever been afraid of AU- anyone who knows me knows this. But I hate to NEED it this badly.

Damn you, JJ Abrams.

Comments

[ramdonomo.livejournal.com]

Hi.

You know what this looks like to me? What it reminds me of? A writer posting a fic on Fanfiction.net, getting pissed because no one read his story or everyone thought it sucked, and saying "Oh yeah? I'm gonna kill EVERYONE next chapter, so there!"

That's just... perfect. I think I love you. I might have stalked followed you from Yahtzee63's journal for the 'Dearly Departed' ficathon. And um... yeah. Just... yes.

That and this: My OTP dies the death of blown to bits and breaking glass, and Sydney and Nancy Boy Vaughn get their happily ever after on the beach?

Yeah. I hate to stalk random people, but you? Deserve it. I adore you and your thoughts as they mirror my own. Which ended up being LONG and uberranty in my own journal, so I hear ya.

Nancy Boy Vaughn. Why didn't he just die with his eleventy four bullet holes. Damn.