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Jul. 16th, 2017 11:18 am
jenavira: Crop of a picture of Tenpou from Saiyuki Gaiden, lounging (Default)
[personal profile] jenavira
My entire life for the past couple of days has just been a series of increasingly bad choices. (Illustrative example: last night's dinner was ice cream sandwiches and beer.) I haven't gotten to bed at a decent time in almost two weeks. But then, this afternoon I have to go to work, where I will stand in a corner and point out the new quiet reading room to people for five hours. Then tomorrow, instead of getting to sleep in, I go straight from one doctor's appointment (where I have to tell them the thing we're doing to make me not tired all the time isn't working) to another (where I have to tell them the thing we're doing to make me not depressed all the time isn't working). And then on Tuesday another doctor's appointment and then work again.

On Thursday I thought I was coming up out of a two-week depressive episode; I had a really good day. Unfortunately I realized I wanted to do things again at the exact same time that I don't have time to do anything I want to do, and it's really hard to sustain optimism in the face of that. Blarg.

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